The Only Black Girl In The Room When…It’s Diversity Training Day
This series of blogposts are inspired by my forthcoming novel: The Only Black Girl In The Room (Release Date: May 7th, 2024), and my life growing up as frequently the only Black girl in the room. I hope that these posts can offer insight, understanding, and a little bit of humor to the small and big moments of being the only. Thank you for engaging with me and my work.
A smattering of breakfast foods lays on the shelves. Tiny chairs surround the wooden tables. Post-its, sharpies, and other office supplies sit at the center of each tabletop. We all file in, coffees in hand, already ready to go home. It’s 8 a.m., and it’s time for professional development. Well, more specifically, it’s time for our equity professional development.
I’m already uncomfortable. I go into any potentially racial situation with a chip on my shoulder and a pit in my stomach because I’ve seen how these discussions can go wrong. Your girl was literally yelled at by a coworker in the leadup to the 2016 election during a very casual nonconfrontational conversation about voting, so like, I never expect these things to go well.
The thing about equity trainings for me... actually there’s a few things. Firstly, I think the trainings can be incredibly important and valuable, if they actually address the power and systemic imbalances present in an organization, which many of the ones I’ve been in don’t. Secondly, it seems as though people feel put-upon for having to attend. I get it; mandatory trainings can feel very annoying and like a time-suck when you have other things to do. But, this feeling and desire to get away from the topic can lead to less productive sessions. There’s this discomfort in addressing topic of equity that keeps us from being willing to actually do what needs to be done. I include myself in this. I’m so rarely comfortable speaking up in these sessions, though I’m working on it too (I am however, pretty solid at bringing it up with the necessary people post-training). Equity isn’t just about issues of race, but they are important, particularly in less diverse organizations. Thirdly, being the only Black girl (and often person) in the room when there’s an equity training, and everyone is grumbling about having to attend, and there’s a (strong but not-quite-said) annoyance at the idea of racial inequities coming up in the session, is skin crawling, honestly. People dismissing that actual structural inequality, that you’ve experienced and seen almost (if not every) every day of your life matters, and acts like they’re being
So here are my (personal) opinions on how to improve your standard office equity trainings based on my experiences in them. These are mostly serious with a sprinkle of sarcasm (that fully holds a current of truth).
1. Don’t dismiss the importance of cultural diversity and racial equity. Yes, there are other forms of equity that are necessary to address. However, underplaying racial/ethnic equity isn’t the way to do that (plus doing so totally undercuts intersectional issues). Note: it’s especially important not to do this when the equity presenters are entirely white, and there are maybe five nonwhite people in the room of fifty.
2. Don’t dance around what you actually want to say. If you’re talking about certain groups, name them. Don’t say, “people of color,” when you’re specifically talking about the experiences of, say, Black people and law enforcement. Speak truth into power, and use truth to make tangible change.
3. Please, please, don’t rely on the only minoritized people in the room to speak up. We’re already so uncomfortable. If you notice something that doesn’t sound right, that sounds microaggressive, say something. If you don’t notice, and someone points it out to you later, use your privilege to say something. So often, I have had to be the one to speak up, the one to risk being viewed as the *angry Black woman* because someone has been absolutely out of pocket and no one wants to bring it up, even though they recognize that it's wrong. I’d love for more of my colleagues to join me. We’re stronger together.
4. For the sake of my personal sanity, please do not start a sentence with, “there’s this great movie called The Help.” No, I will not elaborate further, I trust that this one can speak for itself.
Finally, a quote from MLK, “True peace is not merely the absence of tension; it is the presence of justice.” Equity work is hard, and it is awkward, sometimes painful. Do it anyway. It is beyond worth it to make a better present and future. Sincerely, the only (very outspoken) Black woman in the room.